Can I be forgiven for not posting for so long?

I know, I know—I’ve been absolutely hopeless at updating my Substack! It’s always on my mind, but getting the thoughts out of my head and onto paper (or should I say the screen?) is a whole other challenge. Does saying “paper” instead of “computer” show my age? My 11-year-old seems determined to test my millennial vs. Gen Alpha knowledge lately. It’s both hilarious and terrifying, especially when I realise how fast I’m ageing—yet Mars isn’t quite keeping up at the same rate!

Speaking of Mars, he’s actually been progressing really well.

I don’t want to diminish that, even though it’s been an exhausting time with all those one-step-forward, two-steps-back moments.

His communication and speech have taken a big leap, which we are incredibly grateful for—it’s made some things much easier. But his climbing skills have also levelled up, which means we’re now dealing with regular rooftop missions, both at home and at school. I feel pretty confident that one day he’ll be one of those fearless climbers scaling epic mountain faces and freaking everyone out in the process. But for now, it’s a whole lot of hard work as a parent!

Since I last wrote an update Mars has received an ADHD diagnosis, so I am finding it helpful to use the AuDHD term right now when describing him. He very much has that push/pull to his personality which can be helpful but also detrimental. We are finding it a little bit easier to understand him though with all the “grey areas” we felt he sat in, but these grey areas are still what makes life so difficult. He doesn’t fit into a special education system but also doesn’t fit into a mainstream education system. Quite the conundrum!

Mars' Ice Sculptures

The past few months have been consumed with designing our new home, which is set to start construction at the end of this month. It’s been a huge task for my husband and me, and it has kind of shown us just how neurodivergent we both most likely are, even though we will never have the time or desire to be diagnosed. The amount of thought we’ve put into making it safe and comfortable for Mars is just one part of it—we’ve also realised how many sensory needs we all have and have been working within our budget to accommodate them as best we can. I’m planning (and I use that word loosely because, as you know, I take ages to write!) to share more about this process over the next few months. I’ll be writing about the choices we’ve made, why we’ve made them, and how they’ll help us feel a little more sane in our own home.

2025 is shaping up to be a year of massive change for us—a year that will hopefully bring us a greater sense of family. The goal is to spend less of our waking hours just trying to keep Mars safe and protect our belongings because our home will finally do a lot of that work for us. We’re also applying for the waitlist for a service dog. A companion trained to help Mars regulate, prevent eloping and climbing, and support him (and us!!!) with sleep would change our lives.

So, if you’re still here and receiving my Substack updates—thank you! Please send me all the positive vibes to stay on track with my writing and help bring a little more awareness to the stresses and joys that autism has brought into our lives.